More and more young people (and older) are shacking up instead of choosing to get married. There are many reasons for this: financial, convenience, “love”.
I would like to camp out of the “love” aspect. Do people who cohabitate really love eachother or is there something more sinsiter lying beneith?
St. Paul describes what true love is: “Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.” – 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8
“It [love] does not insist on its own way” – when a person decides to cohabitate it is out of selfishness and self interest rather than taking the other into consideration.
“It [love] does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth” – couples who cohabitate are living in constant wrongdoing while remaining in the darkness away from truth.
“It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.” – With cohabitation there is a lack of commitment. This lack of commitment is due to the fact that if someone better comes along then the agreement is off. There is always that backdoor for the individual if anything unsavoury or better comes up. Because of the lack of stability and the freedom to leave whenever there can be no real hopes and dreams. There is always the possibility of the “love” to end.
The Catholic Church teaches: “In so-called free union, a man and a woman refuse to give juridical and public form to a liaison involving sexual intimacy. The expression “free union” is fallacious: what can “union” mean when the partners make no commitment to one another, exhibiting a lack of trust in the other, in himself, or in the future? The expression covers a number of different situations; concubinage, rejection of marriage as such, or inability to make long-term commitments. All these situations offend against the dignity of marriage; they destroy the very idea of the family; they weaken the sense of fidelity. They are contrary to moral law. The sexual act must take place exclusively within marriage. Outside of marriage it always constitutes a grave sin and excludes one from sacramental communion.” – CCC 2390
Bottom line, if you really love the person then you would marry the other. If you won’t marry the other then you don’t really love them, instead, you are using them for your own selfish needs.
Here is a video that is excellent in exposing the truth behind cohabitation. It is a very interesting and creative way in touching this subject. A MUST SEE!
Shacking Out – Cohabitation Ceremony